i've defected

new journal

Sat, 27 Mar 2004 03:40:14 GMT

hey guys, i have made a new journal.

this one is going to be somewhat friends only, so please comment either on here or on there if you would like to be added or IM me or whatever you want. i'll be glad to add anyone who is on my friends list now. so just let me know if you want to be added and i will add you!!!!

here it is:

nox_et_lux

Sat, 14 Feb 2004 21:47:02 GMT

hi.
i just want to let everyone know that i will not be writing in this journal for a while. i guess you might have assumed that already but i just wanted to let you know in case you were expecting something. i might make a new journal but i doubt it. and i might go back to writing in this, but i'm not really sure about that either. some bad things are going on and i just don't feel like writing in here. i know you don't really care but i'm just giving you my excuse.
anyway, i'll still use this for commenting and i still read my friends' journals. but i'll understand if anyone wants to take me off of their friends lists because there will be nothing to read for a while.
byebye.

Thu, 01 Jan 2004 22:31:57 GMT

first post of the new year. big deal?
i don't really care much for new years. all it does it make me look back on the last miserable year and prepare myself for another one.
sometimes it seems like it could be a chance to start all over.
but in reality all that changes is one little digit. not people, not situations, not me, not you.
i guess you could say i'm a pessimist when it comes to new years.

i have a lovely little cold, complete with sore throat, stuffy nose and slight fever. just peachy.

in lighter news, my virgin ears have been pierced for the first time ever. it was a funny situation. the whole store watched with bated breath as the workers smothered my ears in purple marker in an effort to find the precise spot to puncture. as the earrings pierced my flesh, a loud gasp went throught the crowd. basically, it felt like a shot. as i quickly walked out of the store, i was showered with comments and questions such as: "did it hurt??" "good job! you were brave!" it was surely amusing.

goodbyebye.

Wed, 24 Dec 2003 18:14:28 GMT

hey kidsss i'll be going to my grandma's house for the next couple of days so i just wanted to say
Happy Holidays to all!! :D
i hope everyone has a nice X-mas, Hanukkah, Kwanzaa, etc.!

<3

Tue, 23 Dec 2003 00:36:35 GMT

me + kiwi / december '95
love it.

Fri, 19 Dec 2003 01:10:46 GMT

i played madlibs with ian&morgan last night ohhh the madness

i am listening to the newwww lovely soco cd thanks to rondoh<3

my body has a plan set out for me that says
suzanne you will get a "tension-related" headache at least once a week, almost always on tuesdays or thursdays and it will be like a migraine and you will love every minute of it and you won't complain at all. :PPPP effmeeee

tomorrow is teh birfdayyy :0)

Wed, 17 Dec 2003 02:31:13 GMT

it was a nice day yes indeed

drivers ed is such a bore
mark helped me with my bio homework
and we had fun
because we're crazy like that
and recessive genes are just THAT exciting

ahhh my house is so cooold right now

i swear i had something exciting to say when i started this entry.

i'm still a little confused but i think that everything is alright. or better than before, anyway.

i have 20834729346 pictures that i would like to post but i just never get around to it. soon soon, i promise.

goodnight my loves <3

Tue, 16 Dec 2003 01:00:00 GMT

i bet you never knew how much this hurts
i am demented

your words don't make anything better
three conspirators/a plot for destruction
they will never understand that i hear every single word they say

i expected better from certain people but they have this funny way of always letting me down
...i am not a number...

it was today that i decided that being irrational was totally legitimate
so from now on i will avoid you at all costs

i will be vague and indirect
until you realize
that this is all a dream

Sun, 14 Dec 2003 19:16:05 GMT

i am happy that some coolkids now have livejournals.
even though that jhiehwarqegf girl got one grrr if she ever reads mine i will soertjarewr

my phone isn't working i have noooo idea why
so sorry guys you can't call me
i bet you're crying your fricking eyes out HAH

if i have to waste one more weekend doing bio crap then someone is just going to dieee
dna, rna, ariejroer? who gives a crap? i could be made out of jello for all i care. i'm here, i'm alive and that's all i need to know ok? ok. yeah i know that's stupid.

haha that noose picture in my notebook makes me laugh so much as does that stupid green llama galloping and ron singing thursday/yellowcard in opera/country style.

have a nice day y'all.

Fri, 12 Dec 2003 21:55:36 GMT

i made a very long entry and it actually had some substance to it, unlike most of my entries. but it just sort of deleted itself when i hit "update". oh well there's nothing i can do. so now you get a crappy entry because i don't feel like typing everything out again.

i have some bio/english homework to do this weekend and i also want to finish alll my holiday shopping.

sometimes i feel like i have to be careful about what i write and how much i write.
so now that livejournals are free (yes they are FREE, which was unknown to me until today) i might make another one and make it friends only or something crazy like that. who knows.

simply nothing, nothing simple

Wed, 10 Dec 2003 20:20:35 GMT

i think today was the last day of gym for the year.
the rest of the week we clean out our lockers and then on to drivers ed ohhhyes
ah well i will turn 16 {in 9 days} before i take the written test but soon soon soon ! :)

i have had this really weird feeling all day, like i'm anticipating something...but nothing is supposed to happen...? grr it's really strange and it's really bothering me.

byebye

Wed, 10 Dec 2003 01:47:43 GMT

i love how some people think i'm some kind of inhuman freak
and that nothing they say or do will hurt me
maybe sometimes i just don't show my feelings
actually i've never really been good at expressing how i feel to others
but i only act like some crazy tough guy to save what's left of my self-esteem, babydoll
and believe me when i say that you don't know the half of it

Sun, 07 Dec 2003 00:38:25 GMT

it was a crazy blizzard out there, but i think it has pretty much stopped.
snow has this tendency of making me remember the past and so many fun times.
i will admit that i miss a lot of people and a lot of things but you can't always dwell on the past...especially when the past won't dwell on you.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
today leon and i made huge chocolate chip cookies and set the mixer on fire by accident. that's the second one we've destroyed. haha. and we soon are going to have a movie night at ron's. :D

snowwww :)

Sat, 06 Dec 2003 01:53:20 GMT

Thu, 04 Dec 2003 02:38:32 GMT

hey if anyone has a livejournal code for a friend of mine that would be greatly greatly appreciated!!! you can IM me on escape thedreams (aim) if you happen to have one. thanks a bunch. <3

Thu, 04 Dec 2003 00:54:33 GMT

what in the sam-hill do you think you're doing?
this constant vocabulary is a real pain.
fwah i am crazy
don't ever get me started on subjects of society, braindead teachers, or over-competing/ A+++ or death/ over-achieving honors kids. i can go on for hours upon hours.
why oh why do i go online when i have so much work to do?! ahh i do believe i have just fallen into the category of stupideffing honors kids. please shoot me.

P.S. happy happy birfday rj "penguin boy" gladziewasoiuaywe!!!!!!!!! i <3 you boy!

Sat, 29 Nov 2003 17:14:57 GMT

i have downloaded the free pop-up blocker from yahoo. it is an absolute god. it makes this silly little "bloop" noise when it "catches" a pop-up. i love it.
Total Blocked: 39

OH. and even if you had bothered to ask me i would have said NO suckaaaa. because i have better things to do.

<3

Thu, 27 Nov 2003 03:01:50 GMT

Happy Thanksgiving Everyone!!!!

i have made a list of things i am thankful for. the list is veerrryyyy long so i will include only a few items.

these are the most important from my list:

family-even though sometimes they annoy me to death, i know that i would be nowhere without my family. they are always there for me and they love me no matter how completely insane i am.
friends-another really really important one. thanks so much to all my friends who have listened to me or helped me or just made me laugh. just by being there you've made my life so much more fun. i <3 you all.
(special thanks my loveliesssss ron+sage who both put up with me every single day & always listen to me & make me :D)
the basics-food, shelter, clothing, etc. it may seem silly to be thankful for basic needs, but some people lack these things which really puts everything into perspective.

it goes on and on and just gets corny from there (as if that wasn't corny enough?). but really i do think it's important to be THANKFUL on Thanksgiving along with eating like a pig (although that's a very important part [hence the name fats-getting]). :oP

i can almost guarentee that some amusing pictures will come from today which i will probably post later.

<3

Wed, 26 Nov 2003 22:52:33 GMT

there is nothing fun to say

except that i licked a bar of soap
and my toe is a bloody mess from running into the couch
and i failed that test
all purely by accident, mind you.

yaaayy tomorrow is fats-getting ;)

Wed, 26 Nov 2003 03:28:05 GMT

THIS FOOL IS DONE

like whoa i am

&tired&crazy as well

BUT I AM DONE with EVERYTHINGGGG

a huuuuge weight has just been lifted. gracias a dios.
and even though i did not study for spanish iknow that everything is gonna be okay really it's gonna be okay i promise okay?

iauerabowuyareporwoeprjanqepoqdwermsddbga

gonna bust that ATP up real bad

Tue, 25 Nov 2003 01:14:56 GMT

15 minute break starts NOW.

i don't think you understand.
i have been working my anuspore off these last few days to the extreme power.
so many stupid things went wrong today that it was actually funny.
mr asshole and his "flaming" comments can go die. seriously. you don't know how many times i have said that i am going to kill that crazy bizotch. i was so mad in his class today. i wrote horrible things down in a notebook and planned out how i could murder him. & it's so funny because when i talk to that tom kid, he's just as violent and annoyed. so i'm not crazy. :))))
and somebody copied the SAME EXACT model project i did in english except mine is so much more gehtoe. & sage knows how angry that made me. bwahah.
Oh sage is so wonderful she picked up my piessss. mmmmmm they look soo gooood. wow that was a change of pace...?
well i guess i won't finish the portfolio tonight. that's ok, i have tomorrow.
time to go study for mr fattie now.
<3 you all.

15 minute break ends NOW.

it's that 80's beat

Sat, 22 Nov 2003 17:19:48 GMT

hmmmm
clarksburg last night was pretty fun with rondala & tori & that sneaky rj boy.
local bands will always impress me
saw
aberdeen, lucked out, my fist your face, forevers end, no hollywood ending, some other mofo band
just awesome awesome
hah & all those crazy little boys can just eff my face.

grrrrrrrrrrrr
must do:
[ ] final draft research paper: amphibian decline
[ ] poetry portfolio
[ ] punch you in the face

Fri, 21 Nov 2003 02:24:09 GMT

you should have seen this crazy entry i had in here, you really should have. no. no, you shouldn't have. sometimes it's just pointless to take off like that.
i just wish everything was less chaotic, you know?
but i feel a lot better after talking to some of the best kids in the wooorld
sometimes i need to calm myself down before i get out of control and punch a wall or something crazy like that.
i just need to be less lazy and distracted and do what needs to done as painlessly as possible. i really am trying to work hard, i really am and i do spend a lot of time working. i guess it's just easier to try to convince myself i'm right.
but tomorrow is another day.

i'll make peace when this is done

Tue, 18 Nov 2003 00:14:47 GMT

hautedayum. it's been a while since i've updated. do you care? no? i didn't think so. i wish i had something exciting to say, but alas i do not. my life has been consumed by homework and projects up the anus. i hate it so much that i have decided that i am not going to college, unless it's one of those joke colleges where you don't have to do anything except make up a lot of liberal bull. so i must come up with an alternate plan besides college. it annoys the crap out of my mom when i say i'm not going to college. man, it kills me.

i haven't been online in threeeee days, yes three. and here you thought i was some kind of aim addict, didn't you?? in your fat face?!?! i.think.i.am.going.to.go.online.now.bye.

Mon, 03 Nov 2003 21:47:34 GMT

ugh these ghetto kids in my lunch period are "necking" at the lunch table almost every day. and at the lunch table of all places. it's even more sickening then the cafeteria food or the locker rooms or just the stench of the clayton wing in general. so that's really saying something.
..............................................................................................
while in the hallways i used to wait politely for someone to cut in front of me, or i would say "excuse me" a million times. even if i was just whispering it, i felt less guilty about hitting people with my bag or just taking up oh-so precious hallway space. but now i just push my way through, sometimes even exasperatedly groaning "for christs sake..."
ah the joys of a crowded high school.